Under Standing

May 7th, 2006 Sarano Kelley

Jason: You have truly hit on something for me here…I don’t “suffer” from the need to be understood in the sense that it shows up as strong as my blind spot nor do I perceive that with you. What is interesting is how interested in understanding others I am and how much time I spend “over communicating” or “explaining my communication” in a blatant attempt to avoid being misunderstood. I think as a young child I picked up on this distinction of how important it is to feel understood and I “used” it to build relationships… one where I worked hard to understand and never opened myself to be understood…

In fact, to a great degree, our entire conversation has been me trying to “understand” you. Where you are coming from… what is your perspective… how do you see the world… and on and on…

Not to judge, label or anything other than to seek understanding…This explains a large part of my life and my ability to form and lose relationships…Very interesting indeed…Standing in awe of Heisenberg

Sarano: It is said in certain in circles that some of the earliest Egyptian writings involved a certain tablet that one had to “stand under” in order to read it. Once one had done that, it was said that one “UnderStood”. However, as we look more deeply we see that understanding between human beings is very rare…but why?

Well, let us consider this character we call “Sarano”. One of the most interesting observations we immediately make about him is that he has one fundamental delusion upon which all of his other beliefs “hang”. It is this one delusion which is the source of the “illusion” he calls his life.

Sarano is asleep but dreams that he is awake. This would be harmless if it stopped there. If it stopped there Sarano would be funny, or interesting but not harmful. The problem is that not only is Sarano asleep dreaming that he is awake but he dreams that everyone else is awake and hence believes that he UNDERSTANDS why people do the things they do.

His usual assumption ends up with some version of how “wrong” and “bad” other people are when they do things as if they somehow purposefully and consciously chose to screw up their lives and his day all at the same time.

It is at this point that we find it hysterical when someone cuts Sarano off on the highway and he gives them the finger assuming that they cut in front of his BMW and risked their own lives on “purpose”. It never occurs to Sarano that the other driver was “asleep” in the midst of some
“daydream” just like him. That the other driver did not know that Sarano was in his “blindspot” and was just as surprised as Sarano to find that he had cut someone off. Of course, after seeing Sarano give him the finger, the other driver has no choice but to experience anger and rage with a now justified desire to teach Sarano a lesson…and so and so on until someone
gets killed…so much self righteousness, so much certainty and yet so little Understanding.

Entry Filed under: Post Game