Archive for September, 2007
This week represented my last week of dual role responsibility at work, and I am looking forward to moving back to one job, as is my family. For the week, I achieved 52 out of 58 points (90%), and I am excited to be journaling my lessons learned again, which I have missed since Week 7. It is really amazing how much more I am getting out of the journaling experience because it further integrates and reinforces what I am learning every week. Hard to believe that I had overlooked this best practice until I played this game.
My work with directed attention continues to pay dividends, and yet the more aware I become, the more I realize how asleep we all are. I am finding dozens of opportunities every day to be the detached observer… to just be. As I do, I find that there is no effort required to change my conditioning (i.e. there is nothing to do, only something to see). I find myself giving up control more readily, in less in reaction to outcomes, sidestepping being offended, letting go of value judgments. Everything is in order. Remarkably, I am also able to do this at work where the world seems to be in direct conflict with this approach to living. The more I aware I become, the more I realize I need only “do my work” without expectation. No need to struggle for results, but instead to just be aware while giving it my all.
My biggest opportunities for the remainder of the game center around how I can bring more awareness to my daily activities. It is not about the typical paradigm of doing more, but instead about how I can let go by dropping the weight of my unconscious conditioning. Additionally, I need to establish greater alignment between everything I do and my purpose. As I reflected on my purpose this week, I realized that the “tasks” I am already doing on auto-pilot could actually be done from directed attention, centered on my purpose. My purpose is not some future ideal, but instead an ideal I can hold myself to every day, and I must remain aware of the alignment opportunity with every activity I undertake.
September 30th, 2007
Z Man
Mitchell and Luch,
I slept through my 3am with Mitchell, my 4:30am with the Spiritual Team, and then my 5am with Luch. Of course, besides beating the crap out of myself for screwing up I am allowing others things to “slip” through the cracks. First off, I apologize to both of you and secondly rather than feeling guilty and doing nothing I see the following “structural issues”:
-I did not get ready for bed at 8pm as planned, instead I resisted the end of the weekend (the same way I can’t seem to stop work on Fridays) and went to a friends house, ate a bunch of chocolate chip cookies and ice cream, watched an episode of “South Park” (because I was so full from dessert I could not go to sleep right away was my excuse for that) and then work up 3 and half hours late
-my phone is always a source of complaint for me, “it didn’t go off” which is french for I clearly don’t know how to use it
I would ask for your support in the following ways:
-moving forward I am not allowed to go out on Sunday nights (I also missed calling my mom, sister, brother in law and dad as a result of going out on Sunday night, generating the need for even more clean up)
-I would like to propose to Luch that we move the Spiritual Team call to the evening (at 7:15pm PST) if that works for the team. My meditation has been sporadic and often missing, guilt has begun to paralyze me
-I would ask that Mitchell and I have our call at 7:30pm PST as we had previously scheduled and that anytime I miss a call I have to write an essay on why and send it (at the least to the two of you), I request that Mitchell start working with me (or rather on me) using “consequences” that forward the action
By 8pm I am to start my daughter Grace’s bedtime routine and get her on a regular schedule by starting with getting myself on a regular schedule. I have been (in my estimation) a lousy partner and I am excusing it by getting the results anyway (of course, I am concerned with my results and am too selfish to spend my time worrying about my partners results), as well as, the excuse of my new born child when the issue is not her but me.
This issue of not going to bed on time did not just start when my daughter was born, hence it is clearly a great cover story for masking a long term problem.
I am sending this to my Personal Team, the coaching body and posting it to my blog as a way of starting to put some integrity back into my game. This is only step one of a number of “clean ups” I need to do for my many shortcomings and lack of follow through over this 90 days. I request that the two of you neither excuse me, understand me nor accept this kind of behavior from me.
I look forward to being as good a partner to the two of you, our team, the Spiritual Team and the coaching body as you all are for me. I apologize to everyone in the coahing body for my utter lack of integrity, sincerity and openess in dealing with my own shortcomings.
With No Excuse,
Sarano
September 24th, 2007
Sarano Kelley
Wow, I have not been blogging. I blame this all on the fact that the website was down, it broke my pattern and I developed a bad habit. I’ve reviewed my game. It’s interesting, I started to nail all the little stuff: juicing and meditating, etc..but I have yet to journal one time. I choose to blog. I have discovered that I would rather type than write. So my mission is to join an online journal and go to town. The part of my game that I thought would be the easiest was the losing of the 10 lbs. I have actually gained weight. This is interesting to me. I started with a personal trainer 2 weeks ago, began riding regularly, and I feel myself starting to refocus my mind on getting stronger. I fell in love in May and by end of July I had celebrated my new love at all my favorite restaurants twice. BUT, I am WELL on my way with my book. Yippee. Creating the Perfect Storm. AND I am in the process of getting 10MM dollars in commercial real estate under contract with my good buddy Rod. I can feel it all coming together. Keep it coming universe, keep it coming.
September 13th, 2007
Lori Taylor
As I write this, I am sitting on the dock of my local marina, having just finished a great day of sailing on Long Island Sound. Man do I love being on the water.
I have accomplished most of my stated 90-day Game goals at the mid-point. But I know all too well the goals I have accomplished are the ones that I always knew I would get done. They were the challenging business oriented goals - I always - get those done. On paper this looks great, but I also know that the few goal that I haven’t yet reached are the simple ones that are behavior oriented, like getting up earlier. So for the 2nd 1/2 I am eliminating the challenging sounding business goals. For the next 40 days and nights I will play a very simple game that will be my most challenging to date, by far.
All of the business issues are not yet resolved but the framework is now in place. I am operating with confidence and a clear vision here. Now it’s time to be a better me, because I want to.I am tired of just trying!
Recently a good friend expressed some anxiety at the prospect of reaching the 50-yard line of life (age 45) Why is it that we men do not consider living past 90 to be a possibility? I turned 45 a couple of years ago and it really did change my perspective. I really do believe I have less time left than what I have already lived. It is a bit sobering. But it has possesed me with a sense of urgency, every day. I know my time here is limited a I have accomplished just a fraction of what I want to do. That’s why I was sailing today.
My life is awesome. I have challenging and rewarding business that I still enjoy. My wife is unbelievable. She is a great mom and a perfect partner for me. My kids are healthy and each of them bring me joy daily. Though sometimes I worry about them too much. I worry that Jeo does not have focus or direction at 24. I am very worried about Joe who is 20 and has been battling injuries since mid summer and lost his starting position because he hasn’t been able to practice consistently. I know he is very frustrated. This week the team went on the road and left him behind. Joe has never been through that before and I can hear the pain in his voice. And of course Lara is a 3 year old girl, this is a whole new ball game. So emotional, so sensitive, so bright. I worry about how she will handle relationships with men as she gets older. Will she know how to recognize goodness and sincerity and will she be able to see through the facades. I don’t want her to get hurt.
September 10th, 2007
Mitchell Rubin
Mitchell, sorry I have been sporadic in my contact but believe it or not just the contact and conversations we have had make a serious difference for me. I am shooting you this quick email to let you know that I am headed to the hospital today at 4pm to begin the process of inducing and delivering the baby. Mom is well, the baby is good and Dad is pumped!!! Interestingly, today is exactly 45 days from my birthday on October 23rd when I turn 45! I consider this the “true” midpoint to my game…coincidence…unlikely.
RELATIONSHIP My wife Brooke has given me high marks as both a soon to be new father and husband. While I see much room for improve, she is the umpire and there’s no arguing with the referee. I would also add that my daughter Georgia and I are the closest we have ever been and that she is excited for the birth of her new sister, doing well having completed her first year of college by age 17 and is in a great relationship herself. Also, my ex wife (who is like a sister to me) Chris and my wife Brooke had an incredible breakthrough in their relationship and that the two of them are forming their own relationship outside of me. I can’t take any credit for this and honest to God I believe I have the best ex wife in the world (I hate the word ex but I have yet to come up with another). At the same time my ex wife has made one of the biggest contributions I have ever seen anyone make to my current wife. I must say that I am surrounded by amazing women!
WORK I put my head down to get a number of things done before the baby was born and one of them is attached for your review Mitchell. After spending countless hours on the train to Vermont (to present for Sentinel Investments), writing my Foundation and business plans in the preseason preparation, then putting together the Boards of my companies, I then realized I needed a new management team…bad. The new CEO and CFO are both firmly in place and I have a call with them later today. I have set up a critical meeting of all of the people involved in the business (listed in the attached document that details the ”Organizational Structure and Key Players”) driving the business for October 26th so that you can meet them. I am officially no longer the sole decision maker, manager or driver of the business. This cuts my workload down easily by 50%…this is the reward I get for no longer being a control freak, I get a life! I have the best mentors a man could ask for in George and John who run The Edison Foundation and Chris and Paul who have done over $100 billion dollars in deals. With Mark Victor Hansen (”Chicken Soup for the Soul co author) as my publisher and mentor the only person I do not have as a mentor in business is Oprah. Chris is going to introduce me to his business partner and friend Mike Milken and I have agreed to do some speaking for them I still have no particular access to seeing if Oprah would mentor me. Then again, I got most of the goals in my game done in just 45 days so there is still time, just no real plan or approach.
BODY I woke up this morning and I am officially at my weight goal of 176lbs (actually I am 175) this is down from being 206lbs at the start of the year. The last 5lbs were a pain to lose but I got it done. Now I just need to cut my body fat down from 18% to 9% without gaining weight putting me in the best shape of my life at age 45. I also no longer suffer from crippling back pain and have reduced my stress levels dramatically despite still only sleeping 3-6 hours a night.
HOBBIES I am delaying the start of the final production of the movie on “The Game” but this is an “uptick” not a problem. It gives me more time to work on the script, work with the director who is coaching me (Drew Heriot the director of “The Secret”), and a lot more time for the two most challenging parts of this project fundraising and interviewing top athletes, celebrities and scientist. The project is one of a kind since I am donating all of my profits to our Foundation for children, giving away a technology we have been paid millions for and pulling together some of the best talent in the world from Hollywood, Wall Street and academia.
SPIRITUALITY I am working hard to not make myself wrong for my lack of progress in what is the most important category. I ”pulled” a ”sacrifice play” and front loaded my game with my work initiatives so that I would be mentally and physically free to be focused on bonding with baby Grace. I have not traveled since I did the Senior Market Advisor Expo on August 22nd and will not be traveling currently till mid October. I have increased my Bikram Yoga practice significantly and doing yoga in 105 degree heated room for two hours when it has been 106 degrees outside here is not exactly a lack of commitment. Rather than ”flogging” myself I am taking on some additional commitments in this area.
THE SECOND HALF I can see now that I have to admit that I have not taken your coaching as my partner nor my mentor’s coaching. Both of you have told me that you agree with my desire to have a therapist who truly inspires me to work further on my own emotional development. I have avoided getting this handled…I have ”tried”… which to me “worries” me; I consider it a danger sign when someone is unwilling to examine themselves or be examined. I had a great therapist for many years, we stopped working together after 9/11 and I have not had a serious therapeutic relationship since. This leads me to my second issue. My teacher (affectionately referred to as “Sir”) died well over 10 years ago, his teacher died a few years later. Since that time I have been mostly “self taught” and have taken various courses here and there but it is not even close to “working under attention” and working under attention can only be achieve through direct contact and relationship. I can see now that this is a therapeutic issue not a spiritual issue…that I am avoiding something, that I am somewhere in myself sabotaging myself…I do not know why and since this has been largely unconscious I have no idea what it has or is costing me. While it is great to have a happy wife, prayerfully a happy baby, be at the best weight of my life, my company in the most harmonious shape it has ever been in, my workload and travel schedule becoming the “lightest” they have ever been, I can’t help but hear my fathers voice (Rev. Benjamin Kelley) saying to me “for what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul…”. While my practices of meditation, prayer, scripture, service and study in “good company” continue unabated I can not go beyond myself…I can not take myself to the next level…I need a coach.
First, I will start by locating a therapist so that I can isolate “why have I been avoiding or resisting having a spiritual mentor in my life?” as I go about the process of EARNESTLY seeking that spiritual mentor. Ultimately, this is likely tied to the biggest challenge I have with “The Game” technology, I can produce the results but why can I not remember it is all just a game. Why must I be up when things go well and be down when things seemingly do not, why do I still believe on some level that results are the measure of a man, why is my love for myself still based on external things, why is my happiness tied to anything other than the joy of playing and serving…the Goal being…to be able to walk off the field of life knowing that I can look the Big Coach in the eyes and honestly say “Coach I gave it my all”.
I designed the larger game curriculum to give people with a purpose the ability to create financial freedom and spiritual freedom, few people leave the planet having achieved those two goals. As my teacher said to me “only a man beyond the need of help can be of any real help”. I seem to be excelling at one and losing ground in the other…I MUST COURSE CORRECT THIS NOW!
Mitchell, thanks for putting up with me, you have been one of the best partners I have ever had. Don’t be put off by my occasional resistance or stubbornness and continue to push me, continue to question me, continue to be the example you are for me and so many others.
I go to the hospital now and will spend any moment that I am not with looking after my wife in meditation and prayer, depending on how long we are there I will take on doing the longest single meditation of my life while I am there, perhaps I can replace 8 hours of sleep with 8 hours of none stop meditation…we will see said the blind man.
Peace,
Sarano
September 4th, 2007
Sarano Kelley