Pre Game 31

I have been gone for a long time…not just at my journal…in mind.  It has been a kind of whirlwind and it all ended with my speaking in Palm Beach Florida and then going straight to Hawaii only to come straight back home. We got home just in time for Brooke to get a root canal.  How she was able to work and travel with me while being in intense pain is beyond me.  I am fatigued just from the travel alone.

I feel ready to begin my new game.  I have had a lot of good and “bad” things happen to me over the last couple of days.  On one hand I met a lot of great people, spent time with a CEO I really admire, Vince and then made acquaintance with another CEO who was about as great a man as you get to meet in this world Osworth.  I saw old friends like Jason and new friends like my partner Jon and his wife Robin…God it was good to see him…I could of cried but I was busy acting “manly”…Robin is a gift from God, her strength reminds you of some of the great women out of the Bible.

It has taken me a long time to digest my last game…in a very real sense it wasn’t over…I started The Game with the kids and Jon in his battle for cancer and I never really stopped playing…never really “turned” it off mentally.  The kids program is now demanding even more time and I have to get it done powerfully while still running a business.

Georgia called me…at first she felt guilty for not calling me for so long…I should be the one apologizing not her…at the same time I hate missing people and then spending my time giving them a hard time for not calling me…it was just good to connect.  I think she has made a decision for herself about what she wants her life and her schooling to look like and I admire her courage.  Life was simple for me play by the rules or die on the street or worst yet not play by the rules and have my father “kill” me.  She has had to think…a painful process and one so few people chose…I struggle myself with “thinking” as oppossed to “obeying”, reacting or living into “other” people’s expectations of how my life should be.

I can’t believe that she called me while driving…my little girl is driving a car…I think I’m still in shock!!!  Cars don’t have training wheels!!!

What I am present to from my last game has given me a clear focus in this game.  I can see now that I always try to avoid lows and am addicted to highs.  I can see now how much I create the drama in my life by the choices I make and the ones I am avoiding.  I keep putting off getting married until “this gets done” or “that is where it should be”….I have fallen prey to the mythology of the future and mortgaged my life to it.  I have been avoiding stillness…I have been too busy for peace…I have been too concerned with helping to heal…I see that I now face for me the biggest challenge of all…it is continues to come into focus and on Memorial Day it starts.

Game 31 My Last Game

13 comments May 26th, 2006 Sarano Kelley